Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Three Day weekend

Went down to my mom's for the weekend and had a grand time with the munchkins. We rode go-karts and the kids played on these inner-tube boats that allowed them to spray water on me, each other, pretty much anyone with ten feet of them.

That was Saturday which was wrapped up by lots of Emma helping me knit on Amy's baby's blanket and me trying to get at least one decent picture of Alex.

Sunday, the whole company went off to church except for the heathen who went off to the cemetery to visit with Grandma and Grandpa a bit. After that a bunch of us had lasagna and then pitched in on Amy's house. It's coming along, faster all the time it seems.

We painted and swept, hauled the waste drywall around so it could be used for fill, roasted some marshmallows over brush that needed burned.

It wasn't too bad of a weekend, all told. Well, it was punctuated with a brief argument with Angie (who actually apologized, taking me completely off guard) and going back and forth with some of my facebook friends who insist on denigrating anyone who views the world differently than them. I knew that our differences, politically, were fairly great but I thought that debate could go back and forth without stooping to personal attacks and insults (at least I tried not to engage in that). But, it didn't work and I ended up having to delete people. I hate doing that shit. I'd almost rather not be on a social networking site than have to take that step but, it's done now and I do feel a bit better knowing I won't have to deal with that bs everytime I change my status or want to post some article or cartoon that catches my attention. Yes, I'm a liberal with socialist leanings. I don't think that gives someone more conservative the right to act like a disgruntled parent who's determined that I learn the 'way the real world works.' Anyway, I'm still struggling with feeling like I just don't fit in anywhere these days. That didn't help. Feeling like I'm ever further on the outside of the clique down home didn't either. I just feel a certain level of resignation over it and, recognizing that, well, it made me feel another layer of sadness. I'm not changing, they're not changing and the level of acceptance I feel when visiting just doesn't seem to be changing, either. Aw, hell, just go look at the pictures of Emma and Alex again. That's a much more cheerful activity than this, lol.


  1. Awwww, Nita! I'm sorry you feel so lonely! There is no excuse that could be given to people who make your life difficult only because you have different opinions. It is never easy standing alone - one of the reasons that people rarely stand up to injustices. However, you're loved for who you are!

  2. I don't really know how to describe what I'm feeling lately. I can't say it's loneliness cause I spend a great deal of time with friends and I can't say it's depression cause I've been there and remember what it's like. This is different. I just feel off track and don't know how to get back.