Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Day 189

So, I have to make this decision by tomorrow night and I still don't know what I'm doing. It represents a big change, either way I go and I'm not enjoying the idea. And, yet, somehow, it feels less drama-laden than it did when it was thrown in my lap last week. I'm confused. And, I hate that feeling. I want things to be clearer-cut.

Still processing the shift from PSG and its magick to reality and the mundane. I'd love to be able to craft a synopsis of it, to encapsulate all that it is here for you guys but it's still too big an experience for that. In my usual quiet way, I feel like I absorbed a *lot* from those eight days not to mention picking up some more wonderful friends.

I'm feeling less fearful/anxious/worried since returning, though. (Less doesn't equal without, sadly) I'm looking around for some fun these days and finding bits of it here and there. Going out and getting my first tattoo (quite spontaneously for me) counts in that direction. Trying to find time for a visit to KY and camping again AND going on a derby float trip soon amid all the other stuff I've got going weekends is a challenging bit of that 'fun' thing, too. Stina: I swear I'm visiting soon so get the spare bedroom ready. I'm recovering my love for St. Louis but still need my escapes.

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